Sonnet Sunday 14: Sometimes the Rage Comes

Image Credit: Dave Scriven

I’m a pretty even-keel person. I rant, but it’s usually about silly things, and usually followed immediately by a laugh. But every once in a while, something happens to truly incite my fury.

I don’t remember for sure, but I suspect this poem was inspired by a truly nasty fight with my manager at work—the culmination of months of disagreement over strategy. I think we were civil in handling the situation, but our anger at each other was obvious. That situation still ranks as one of my worst experiences at work.

The funny thing is, it also marked a turning point in our relationship for the better. I suspect we each had independent conversations with her boss about the conflict, and I at least walked away with a better understanding of her perspective and approach. Over the years it’s grown into a really good working relationship. We don’t always see eye to eye, of course, but these days any conflicts are more centered around using our different approaches to find the absolute best solution. It’s great… but it would have been nice to not have traveled the path of rage to get to this point.

Sometimes the Rage Comes

Originally written January 28, 2013

Sometimes the rage comes, crawling through my skin–
Primal reaction to the gleaming snare
Of circumstance—calling forth its twin:
Oppressive helplessness springs from its lair
And sizes up my spirit (hopeless prey!)
And chooses where to poke and where to prod
And with deft jabs drives me to disarray.
Defenses down, they pry through my façade
‘Till I, a victim of my own intent,
Lash out, a wounded animal, in pain,
My own strong feelings causing my descent
Into my own black heart, where hope is vain.
Although I try my feelings to disguise,
I am the truest cause of my demise.